Thoughts 0019

I just wish there was something I could have done at the time. I can’t stop thinking about that message. It was just so familiar. I’m worried and upset. It’s not something I can control. I understand why it happened but it still doesn’t make it fair. My eyes hurt. I’m tired I should sleep. My mind’s so awake though. I have other things I’m already stressing about too. I guess something always had to ruin a good day. Something so tragic it broke my heart. I have no control of the situation but neither do I have control of my feelings. Just take deep breaths you’ll be fine in the morning. Aren’t you? Ofcourse you’re always fine. You have to be. 

I hope what I’m thinking never happens. Bummer if it does. Would be a huge loss. I would very devastated a lot more than I am now. I’m tired. 0024. 

Note To Self

You’re young, stop stressing over things that won’t matter in five years. I know you think it’s the end of the world if you didn’t get a perfect score on that test but you’ll still live. Your hair doesn’t look good? Chill out, you’ll live. You got something that’s bothering you? Wait a day before you react. If it still bothers you try to logically solve the problem. If a day has gone by and it no longer bothers you then it wasn’t a problem that begin with. Stop wasting time reacting on things that aren’t important. There are a myriad of things you could be focusing on other than moaning about irrelevant issues that probably won’t even matter after twenty four hours. Let go of things you can’t control and live a little. Life is too short to be stressed. So many people waste their lives being worked up on certain things. Well it’s probably not worth it.

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Hello world! Wow it has been so long ever since I last blogged publicly. I missed it so much. I have been very busy, senior year is so stressful! I planned to restart this blog during new years but I got busy until now. But finally I am able to blog and catch up again! Boy there are so many things I want to write about I have no clue where to begin. Let’s just start with a little life update.

First of all with school – it has been so stressful. Second quarter just ended and I feel like a huge weight got lifted off my shoulders. I was not being a good child during second quarter and I skipped a few classes which caused me to have grades lower than an A. It was a pain in the ass. Also calculus became imposible for me because I stopped paying attention (probably not a good idea). I’m taking an EMT class and that’s about the only class I can tolerate. I actually started my hospital clinicals today which was super exciting and exhausting at the same time. So I got accepted to five colleges: The U, SUU, Snow, Dixie, and Westminster. I got a full ride scholarship to SUU and I got a scholarship from Dixie as well. But I really want a go to the U. It’s the most convenient for me and they have a good nursing program. The only thing is its so expensive. Whereas, if I go to SUU I don’t need to pay for tuition. Ugh decisions decisions…

 Life update health – I am trying to be the healthiest that I can be. I have been going to the gym everyday ever since the year started and I have been (trying) to eat healthy. I’m gonna be honest I struggled with that today because I think I’m about to get my period and my crazy cravings were kicking in. But so far I think I’ve been doing really well. 

Life update relationship – My boyfriend and I are dating for almost a year now. I can’t believe our one year is in less than two months. Everything’s great. You have your occasional pettiness (mostly from me) but this is the happiest I’ve ever been and that’s something I always like to remember. 

That’s all I can think of, so far, Christmas and New Years was fun I got to celebrate NYE and Christmas Eve with my boyfriend. I think this new year is gonna be pretty lit. I definitely will have more freedom than ever. I’m graduating in four months and starting college in eight. Oh how time flies.